Banana Nutrament

10/05/2005
Black Metal Chat Room

Far be it from me to try to steal any thunder away from The Black Metal Dialogues (via Gumbyfresh), but every now and then, when I need a lighter moment, I troll Black Metal chatrooms. I don't even have to do much, these people unintentionally write funnier stuff than I ever could:


[Eisenfaust] has someone listened to the new Hellfucked album?
[ATA] Anybody heard the new Akercocke?
[MTIRD] analcunt
[infernal vulture] ugliness shall be endeth
[UglinessAndSecretions] you know what anus cunt is?
[23DeadRosicrucians] I got the new akercocke
[--Etoile noirE--] ackercoke argh is a big shit
[UglinessAndSecretions] hey, whats you problem man?
[i*am*the*black*wizards] we are children of odin and thor
[Odd-Einar] u deny humans conquered the world?
[infernal vulture] rats are sucessful creatures, yet eagles are near extinction
[sven hoek] hahaahah
[melrick] some aliens are creaters of life in the galaxy
[sven hoek] and they are extradimensional entities
[melrick] some aliens are daemons
[sven hoek] aliens are gods
[Odd-Einar] scientology is insane, cause they say aliens landed on Hawaii 7 million years ago, but the problem is that Hawaii didnt exist at that time
[sven hoek] scientology is a money making scheme
[infernal vulture] all is just a fucking jewish conspiracy
[23DeadRosicrucians] L Ron Hubbard belonged to a sex magick cult in Florida in the 30s before he started scientology
[Alex Schwarz] Satan is like Darth Vader or something
[Odd-Einar] nobody listens to your feeble illogic views on nature/ humanity
[sorrowtears] aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
[23DeadRosicrucians] the world as a whole has never been ready to accept enlightenment... those who cant understand it have always tried to destroy those who do...
[UglinessAndSecretions] black metal man does not want to believe...he wants to disbelieve and destroy!
[Odd-Einar] humans are better than animals thats an universal truth
[UglinessAndSecretions] how is that a universal truth..?
[noisebastard] animals dont eat mcdonalds and listen to Eminem
[Odd-Einar] nobody will manage to kill Varg, he's so powerful and true, a real necrokult frostbitten bastard, krieg as hell
[banananutrament.blogspot.com] can anyone recommend any Christian friendly Black Metal bands?
[VikingligrVeldi] are you kidding?
[SuSa] lol
[SuSa] christian black metal = ass shit
[NocturnoC] lol
[Alex Schwarz] there is no such thing, banana nutrament
[BuriedTemporarily] yeah there is
[Lord of Tears] Christ's Womb is good
[BuriedTemporarily] white metal
[NocturnoC] lol
[VikingligrVeldi] how about "Cut Your Flesh and Worship Satan"?
[Alex Schwarz] it's not black metal then
[Pure_Hatred] Black metal is Antichristian, it is like asking for satanic gospel
[NocturnoC] then it isnt black metal
[Alex Schwarz] well, black metal is the satanic gospel
[Pure_Hatred] Try Satanic Slaughter, banananutrament, they are pretty christian
[NocturnoC] try antichrist 666, good christian black metal
[Pure_Hatred] or Impaled Nazarene
[ShieldMaiden] no he shall try Archgoat
[Alex Schwarz] Setherial is a good christian band
[Pure_Hatred] Diabolis Arising
[CrepuscolarWhisper] don't forget Havohej, songs about God's love, flowers, coloured birds and etc...

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